He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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