I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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