i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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