It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
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Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
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I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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