Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
