HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize