I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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