u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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