at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
