I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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