It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize