found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
