I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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