yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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