I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
worst night to have a conscience
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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