Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
