new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
