Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
