It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize