I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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