forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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