This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
