i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
