so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
