I can't watch pbs sober anymore
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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