Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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