Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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