I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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