tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
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