I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Farmville is her only friend.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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