Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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