if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
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