ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
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