you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.