Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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