Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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