i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize
