So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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