But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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