Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
