Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
