he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
