whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
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