Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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