lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
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now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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