He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.