On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
