do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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