This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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