i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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