Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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