i need an iv and a liver transplant
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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