Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
